Celebrity couples have been the ‘poster child’ for love for decades.
When we see our favorite celebrities dating, engaged or married to other celebrities we admire, we tend to look at these individuals like ‘Gods’.
In an era where everyone can be ‘bae goals’ based on photos (sent by their public relations teams) that give off an allure of happiness that most of us secretly envy, it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing our situations to those we see online.
Modern women are more in tune with the “idea” of being in love and having ‘bae’ all over social media, than to actually work on a deeper level of keeping and caring for a significant other.
Instead of seeing our partners as human, we treat them like ‘props.’
We get excited about our new boo. We want to ‘show off’ to our friends and family that we are finally ‘claimed’ and found our ‘Jay’ to our ‘Bey.’
But what happens when these celebrities or influencers we look up to as examples lose their allure of ‘perfection’?
Recently, America’s favorite Latin couple, Jennifer Lopez – aka ‘J-Lo’ – and Alex Rodriguez – aka A-Rod – was in the news after they announced they had broke off their engagement.
The announcement came after it was alleged that Rodriguez, 45, cheated on Lopez, 51.
Following that, the break up of millennial hip-hop couple Saweetie, 26, and Quavo, 29, announced their split after two years of a seemingly happy relationship came crumbling down.
The ‘Icy’ Rapper alleged that Quavo was being unfaithful.
Quavo, who many know from the rap group “Migos,” publicly responded back, questioning Saweeties’ character.
Then you have influencer, author, and self-proclaimed ‘Self-love Ambassador’ Derrick Jaxn, who women seek advice from on dating and marriage.
Jaxn, 30, was recently accused of allegedly cheating on his wife with damning evidence from an alleged mistress. Not to mention, Jaxn rarely ever posts photos of his wife, leading some of his followers to believe he was never a married.
So why, after all this, does our society seek confirmation of ‘baegoals’ or #marriagegoals from people they not only do NOT know personally, but these individuals also have issues that most of us would not want for ourselves?
Why would we want every personal moment with bae to be ‘followed’ by others, only to speculate something that may not be true, causing speculation to seep into our relationships with significant others.
We live in a “social media bubble,” living vicariously through these individuals not knowing what is really going on the other side of that camera.
We look at a celebrity couple kiss thinking, ‘aww I want what they have,’ not knowing they may have just argued two days prior. They may have a health crisis they are dealing with, infidelity in the relationship and all kinds of other things most of us wouldn’t care to endure.
Unfortunately, the pressure of perfection and keeping an image to uphold to followers is costing more than just the sales of a simple book, product, or image. It’s costing the livelihoods of the individuals involved and false hope for their admirers.
We have to get to a point where our own personal goals and desires of what we want as individuals in our own lives matters more than putting on a front for “the gram.”
Perhaps if we got back to the basics of not sharing every personal detail of our lives and not posting every photo we have with ‘bae’ or announcing every time we are making a ‘move’ with a significant other, we can have a level of protection for ourselves and the people we say we care about.
The only way to learn to be in a healthy relationship is proper communication and understanding what you and your significant other want, not based on others’ opinions, but through authentic trial and error.